So today I had a short but poignant message conversation with someone who I respect on a spiritual level and quite like too. He complimented me on something I had written and then deleted and asked me why I deleted it. When I explained that I didn't want to offend or further the upsets by my own opinion, he told me I was sweet and had never been mean.
For some reason that put me on a writing frenzy lol. Part of what I wrote back to him is mixed in below along with extensions of it and further thoughts.
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I have spent many years working on myself and walking my path. I share what I can along the way if others wish to listen or walk with me a bit that's wonderful. That doesn't mean it's always easy for me.
I too can be bitter and cruel when my mood is foul or more likely when I see people I care about or respect attacked. Many times I have mumbled harsh words or thought not so nice things before realizing what I was doing. Even now, after I've learned to be mindful of my thoughts, words, and actions, sometimes one might slip by before I get a handle on it.
I have no problem discussing differences in belief systems because essentially, at their true core, most beliefs are very similar. Similarity breeds love, whereas differences often breed hate or something close to it. So it is often best to seek the similarities first and work our conversations from there.
I see people talk about how our differences can be learned from and that is true but to do so we must FIRST find common ground. Then we have to remember that it does not affect OUR life if another doesn't agree with us, that keeps us from getting defensive. We can only learn from our differences if we are open to hearing the differences. Hearing means listening completely not thinking of what we will say next while the other person is speaking.
If I believe that God is a little green alien (which I don't lol) and you believe God is a huge energy force that appears as a lightning bolt, that's pretty different. Could it start a war? Yes! Should it? Not at all. What do I care if you think God is a lightning bolt? Does that hurt me or affect my ability to believe in my little green man? No it doesn't. However many perceive it as a personal offense when another doesn't follow their own line of thinking.
If we were to leave off the descriptions, we could simply move forward from the fact that we both believe that there IS a God. There is our similarity and with that we have connection. Connection breeds love and love keeps us from cruelty and malice.
I myself can still be guilty taking offense too easily. My husband is wonderful but he and I often do not see eye to eye on all spiritual matters. He is very literal and analytical with everything. And there are times when he disagrees and I hear "You are WRONG" even when he hasn't said that. Those times I often end up very hurt when I don't need to be and he ends up sorry when he didn't need to be. Of course later, when I'm in a better frame of mind, I often look back and realize that my best course of action would have been just to allow him the freedom to keep talking until he worked it out for himself. Sometimes silence is a real friend.
I need to remember that he is mostly thinking out loud. He is bouncing thoughts, ideas and opinions off me and I can choose how I react. Whether we agree or not does not affect my personal ability to believe as I wish.
And even if someone did say the words "You are WRONG" that does not affect my ability to believe as I wish. For another to KNOW I was wrong would mean that they KNOW they are right and I personally do not believe that to be possible while we walk here in the physical.
Furthermore, if they truly were a great spiritual teacher or leader then they would choose different words to help me find a higher truth. They would wish to approach me in love not with negativity that would surely hurt me emotionally and shut me down mentally.
My point is that we all have it in us to react on these strong human emotions that we have been given. Whether we do and HOW we do is a choice. So often I see so many who do not think before they speak, they simply react and it ends badly. I am just as capable of this as the next person. I simply choose to think before typing and I try to before speaking.
Another thing I see all too often is people who breed negativity in order to feed off it's powerful energy. These are people who truly do not know how to connect with Source and recieve energy on their own. Most times they are unaware of it and do it because we all require energy to survive. The most dangerous of these are people who are in spiritual leadership positions and yet they feed off negativity, aggression, violence, depression, anger, and the like.
(There is another type who constantly seek sympathy and attention to obtain their energy. It's much harder to recognize the ones seeking sympathy and attention because we all need that sometimes, but for those who use it to feed it is a way of life. I have fallen prey to these types a couple of times. One I didn't recognize until she had literally almost killed me. But these are for another discussion entirely)
People like this (meaning like the first type) will often start discord and then watch as it spreads. They feed off the energy that they themselves created.
This is very different than simply having disagreements or differences of opinion. People who require negative energy to feed off will often incite riots both in real life and on message forums.
Be wary of this. Do not fall into the trap it creates. Use your ability to choose and think before you type or act. If you feel that you might say something cruel or that might further the negative energy that is beginning to grow, stop! Walk away. Come back when your mind is clear and then respond only if you feel you must.
Once again sometimes silence is the best answer.