I am in Hell, a swirling vortex of pain, sadness, anger and regret. Reliving mistakes, past feelings of loss and want. I don’t remember being this low. I reach out.. find a place to lean, the post gets kicked out from under me. I help a sorrowful soul, bring them out of the depths, to hear yes I feel better, thanks, then the knife plays between my ribs as the peals of laughter fill my soul. A warning .. I am unstable, raw and bleeding. If you need to **** with me, have at it.. I have no more to lose. There is nothing left. I know now.. that not everyone gets to be loved. Not everyone gets the return. I would have settled for respect, but that isn’t within my grasp either. I hardly ever come down here. They have been waiting. Guess they missed me more than I knew.
