Thank you, GOD. I was in a place, a deep dark place, a place from which I wanted to run. I planned my escape but I listened. You reminded me you can't run from what's in your mind; it'll still be there wherever you are.
I thought next of just going into my mind, blocking out my body, living in the world that's in my head. You asked me could I do that to my family and friends. Could I really leave the ones I love. Their faces came to mind and I knew then I couldn't leave them.
That left me with just one choice: deal.
I knew I couldn't do it alone - I couldn't be alone. Not anymore.
I finally, in that deepest dark moment, with songs playing in my head (a warning before hallucinating) and visions of a knife and of blood, I finally truly completely gave myself to You. This was more than my mind, more than my heart - my soul cried out for You.
And You were there.
You'd always been there, waiting patiently, pleased that my mind and heart had turned to you long ago. But waiting, just the same. Just waiting for my soul's cry out to You.
I'm no longer alone. Ever.
You told me to reach out to my friends not reach in to myself. You sent Your Holy Spirit to me, to guide me out of the labyrinth of pain and sorrow.
Thank you, my GOD. Thank You, Jesus my Lord. Thank you, Holy Spirit. With Your help, my GOD, I will sing your praises until You call me home, where I can sing forever. Thank you.